Posted by: anniewilson | December 11, 2008

Men…who needs ’em?

I promised that I would let you know how my plan turned out Monday night. It went just fine. We still haven’t done “it” but that’s OK, I had enough red wine to make it a bad idea that night. Although, that didn’t stop me from having quite a bit of fun. 🙂

The problem is that it’s left me more confused than ever. I thought it would answer my questions but it didn’t do that at all. It just made things worse. I’m a nit wit. I’m about ready to just give up and stomp off into my own little corner.

I don’t understand men at all. They either want to nail you on the first date or years after it. I can handle the first kind, I just say, “Fuck off.” But the other kind of guys are baffling little mysteries and I’m about ready to just join a convent. Seriously, I have really, really thought of that. I’m not sure what the convent rules regarding fuckbuddies are, I would have to keep that guy. He’s the only one that I DO understand.

It’s all good. It’s just that I’ve kept my feelings for this guy under control for long enough. I’ve known him for close to ten years and after a while, feelings can just sneak up on you. Generally I don’t give them a second thought but now I am…and that can’t be. I’ll be damned if I’m going to have feelings for a guy. That has NEVER worked out for me. I may try it again, but like one of 2 people about to jump off a cliff would say, “You first.”

In the meantime, I’ll finish a painting that I started a while back. I haven’t worked on it in forever so I really should get back to it. That way I can be distracted rather than sit here trying to figure out a guy. And then, sometime soon, my sweetie of a fuckbuddy will come over and take care of any other tensions that I might be experiencing and I’ll be golden.

I think that I just figured that guy out and I wasn’t even trying to! I had a total epiphany and it hit me that his entire problem is that he never shows any vulnerability! TA DA!

I don’t know what the hell to do with that information but now I see, he’s just as frightened as I am. Cool. I can handle that.

Oh well, if they don’t get you coming, they’ll get you going so I shouldn’t expect much anyway. It’s raining outside and it has been for a couple of days. My dog hates the rain and won’t go out in it unless I take him out on the leash. Last night I had to take him for a walk in the rain and I did not enjoy that one bit. I got halfway around the block before I turned around and went back the way I had come. The rain was mixing with the falling leaves to make for a slippery sidewalk and I wasn’t in the mood to be lying on the side of the road with a broken bone. If I had kept walking the way I was headed, I would have walked down a sidewalk right next to the street and that’s too close to cars for me to even consider falling. With my luck I’d fall and the car would just run over my head. I wonder if they would bury me with the smashed head or if they would just wipe it up and throw it away? Do you know? I never thought of that before.

It seems as though I’m going to have to go out in the rain again and I do so hate that. I could take an umbrella but that wouldn’t really let me control the dog as much as I need to. Think about it, Mary Poppins didn’t have a dog.

Well, I should be on my way. I might come up with something fun to do and I might just get wet, but one way or another, I have to act like I’m going somewhere.

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Responses

  1. You wrote about fuckbuddies and getting wet “one way or another”? Wow!! Down little guy! Down!!

  2. LOLOL, I got wet because it was raining. But, I do have an amazing fuckbuddy that I adore. He’s a doll, he’s much younger than I and he’s built just how I like ’em. I’ve written about him before!


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