Posted by: anniewilson | December 25, 2008

Alabama fun at Christmastime!

last night and although I had a really, really, really good time, sometimes I wish I could just tell my dates that I really need the cash more than I need the great evening. A sweetheart of a guy came over last night after he dropped his son off at the kid’s mother’s place. His son was with the mom and all of my kids are with their father this year so we decided to hang out together to avoid the lonliness.

As he was sitting on my couch, waiting for me to finish getting dressed, he had a brainstorm. “Are you up for a road trip tonight?”, he asked.

“Define road trip.”, I cautiously responded.

With a huge smile on his face he answered me, “Let’s go gambling in Alabama!”

I graciously accepted, hiding my confusion. Alabama? Gambling? On what…cock fights?

Apparently there are some things about this neck of the woods that I didn’t know. I had no clue that there were casinos in Alabama. I figured they would have Bingo, Alabama seems like a Bingo sort of state. But casinos?

I wondered if I was dressed well enough for a casino when I thought to myself, “It’s fricking Alabama…I should be fine.”

So, off I went for a night of merry making and high rolling fun…deep in the heart of Dixie.

The name of the place we were going is actually “VictoryLand”. I don’t know why they didn’t just go all the way and name it, “YouCan’tLoseLand” but I’m not one to quibble over minor details. šŸ™‚ They had a dog race track and OTB on other dog and horse races all over the country. But, to my date’s dismay, the dogs don’t run on Christmas Eve.

But even so, as we drove up the long, palm tree lined driveway and I saw the beautiful fountain near the valet parking dudes…I started to think…”Ooh! This is Alabama? It’s sort of nice!”

It was pretty much a huge complex with a dog track and some other buildings and the casino in the middle. As we walked in, I could see the slot machines. I knew they were slots because of the various types of women who were sitting at them. The machines themselves looked nothing like the slot machines of old…not one single one armed bandit had an arm.

Ordinarily, if I were to gamble, it would be on a game that I understood like blackjack. I didn’t understand one of those silly machines…they were like a cross between pin-ball and a video game. I don’t really care for either of those. So, where were the other games? They HAD no other games. This was one huge ass casino full of slots. Now the Alabama connection was becoming clearer.

My date handed me rolled up coins that I thought were quarters but they were short rolls and they said $25.00 on the side. They were all gold dollar coins. This guy actually went to the bank to get those coins especially for me…wasn’t that sweet? After being married to someone who gives mouse earrings as gifts for so long, I had almost forgotten how nice it was to go out with a thoughtful guy. I like it.

That brings me back to my original comment. Do you know how hard it is to throw away money like that when I have so little? Just one of those rolls would have doubled by checking account balance. But I couldn’t just say, “No, that’s OK, I’ll just keep the money, thank you.”

From the time my date filled up his gas tank before we left to the time we stopped for a couple of Cokes for the ride home, that guy spent hundreds of dollars. I certainly had fun and I’m so glad that he thought of me, but c’mon…I could pay a stack of bills with hundreds of dollars. I’m not quite sure what to think of that.

But, as I said, I had a great time so I should just be happy with that. That and the fact that we even made it home in one piece. The roads were unnervingly slick, we hydroplaned 3 times and once we hit what looked like road but was in reality at least 4 inches of water going about 60. (That’s when I got as lucky as I was going to get…I freaked and grabbed his arm.) Then, as we drove into Atlanta, we passed two really bad looking wrecks.

It’s been quite a while since I’ve been out on such a nice date with such a nice guy. Unfortunately, I’m afraid this one is doomed to failure before it even gets’ off the ground. First of all, the guy is, once again, younger than I am and quite the nice looking youngun’. I could almost handle that but the last time we went out, I grabbed his upper arm at one point and it was as hard as a rock. I know what that means.

That means that there is more under the clothes…like ripped abs and sculpted thighs. Now, there’s certainly nothing wrong with a guy who is in such great shape. But, that really sets the bar a bit too high for me to handle. With all of my clothes and my Victoria’s Secret bra on, I probably look like any other tiny little female…but underneath them you’ll find quite a few mushy areas that I could never allow a hunk like that to fondle.

Crap. I guess I have to limit myself to fat guys and pot-bellied old men. That’s OK…I can handle that, as long as they don’t have those tiny little legs that make them look like a water tower. If a guy is gonna be fat, he has to be fat from head to toe.

Of course, for the time being I’m sort of stuck with that dude with a great body. I’m not sure how to deal with that but I shall trudge on through this responsibility with all the glee that I can muster.

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